Fear

Fear is not the enemy, infact fear can be a great survival mechanism, without it, we will take some really stupid risks with our lives (sometimes alcohol and other substances help dull that sense, usually with catastrophic results). However, fear can become rather crippling and stop you taking risks, hindering any chances of progression in life.

First we must recognise which aspect of our life is hindered by fear, could it be a fear of rejection? Or taking on new challenges due to a fear of failure? Once it is recognised, then it must be tackled. Most times, fear is due to certain flaws that we have and feel overwhelmed by. Unless it is due to a complete loss of a limb, for example not being able to be a Formula 1 driver because you are an amputee, then most flaws are really down to certain instances in our lives that may have had a negative impact psychologically, and put you off that particular activity. Once we can accept that flaw and work on improving it, we regain confidence and are able to try again. We can't let the fear of failing completely truncate the possibility of success, we really only require a close analysis of where a little extra work needs to be done.

Remember, with better preparation, an overhaul of your own perception of your abilities and an open mind, you can overcome your fear. If it can be done, you can probably do it, as long as you do not let fear work against you.

A Successful Life

I believe the one thing we all owe ourselves as we navigate our way through life is happiness, it is the ultimate goal. Think about it, absolutely everything we do is geared towards either an instant, or protracted elevation of our mood. Sometimes, the pressures of life do throw a monkey wrench in our gears of bliss however, and we do require a few tricks up our sleeves to ensure we don't spend too much time marinating in these pesky moments.

One thing that would elevate your mood is reflection on the good things in your life, no matter how bad things get, there is always something we take for granted and forget to be grateful for, take stock of these things and smile about it, while giving yourself the required boost to tackle whatever it is that may be getting you down. Attract some good karma while you are out and about, spare some change for those that need it, or grab an extra cup of tea for that person living on the streets, your act of kindness and compassion will have an effect on your mood as well as the recipient's.

Learn and regularly practise breathing exercises, these have been proven to help reduce stress and anxiety. A quick online search will provide some very effective methods that can be useful when you find a few moments of quiet to gather your thoughts and clear your mind of clutter. Listening to some soothing music can also help elevate mood. I believe the definition of a truly successful life is one where very little time is spent being sad or allowing negative energy to have more than a fleeting moment in it. Think about it.

Element of surprise

Giving a gift is always a pleasant occassion for the parties involved, I like to believe, the giver feels elated that they have contributed somehow to elevating the recipient's mood, and ofcourse the gift receiver has a cool new toy or accessory to enjoy. Deciding what the perfect gift is takes knowing the recipient quite well, or going about your selection of appropriate gift by asking exactly what they would like. The trouble is, as effective as this method is, it can get rather boring when you already know what you're getting. A key part in the presentation of a great gift is the amount of thought that has gone into it's selection and the element of pleasant surprise involved when the idea is spot on.

One tip is to go with an unusual, unique gift. Be creative, with a tiny bit of effort, you will find a perfect gift not just picked off the shelf of your local retail chain, and it does not have to be impractical either. It may be a beautifully designed Cushion cover, a trinket box or a necklace made out of Coconut shells (I have seen quite a few really cool ones). The idea is to present something that is one of a kind, when most of the other folks are probably giving the same old generic gifts, meaning you get to stand out, which in turn means your gift WILL be remembered and that gesture will very likely be reciprocated at some point.

Where do your dreams go?

Remember all the dreams you had about what you would love to be when you grow up? I have a feeling not a lot of people get to live their dreams, I understand how some of these dreams may have been bound to fail because they were unrealistic to begin with (those ideas of being Catwoman when you get older was really never going to happen, was it?). With more down to earth desires however, how does it get lost?

The reality of having responsibilities to meet, and bills to pay may have driven one to take the easiest, available option with regards to making a living, but the dreams don't have to die. If you aren't totally overwhelmed with life, make a cup of tea and ponder how in your current situation you can STILL make your dream come true. Take a close look at the skills you may have acquired up to this point, therein may be something beneficial in making those steps towards your dreams easier than you thought.

Create a plan and follow it. Do some research into your career/path of interest, look at the option of further training, if needed, speak to close friends and family about it. Most importantly, feel the fire in your stomach, feel the desire to pursue your dream, if these are not present, you may just be walking in a different direction and still end up at the same destination you thought you were escaping, another dead end job with zero satisfaction.

Beautify your neckline

There is a degree of master craftsmanship that goes into the creation of the more, earthy item of jewellery. They are always a beautiful blend of spirituality and style. The use of bright colours, gems and natural raw materials makes for trinkets you will not find in your local retail fashion chain.

Most ancient cultures believed these gorgeous, carefully crafted adornments were a way to embody the beauty of the gods. Interestingly, the same level of attention and details still exists today, as you will find if you visited the local market in certain parts of the world. The creativity required in making a polished, wearable and fashionable necklace out of bits of wood or specific shells can be quite remarkable. There is often a mix of culture and modern day style, incorporating the trends of today flawlessly with traditional works of art from centuries past. This state of having it's own unique identity makes owning handcrafted items of earthy jewellery a necessary addition to any wardrobe, especially if you are a trend-setter.

Gift giving made easier.

When buying a gift, most of us wish we had a limitless supply of money to buy the most memorable, fantastic gift that will stand out from any other. However, it's mainly the 1%'ers that can splash out like that without wincing. The rest of us must take a step back and re-assess the idea behind gift giving. With a bit of creativity, a gift could be found to have the same wow effect without ruining your bank account.


If it is say, for a person with whom you share mutual friends, how about you guys pool together and buy an expensive gift? Only thing is, there may not be much of a personal touch to it. For that, bake them a cake maybe, every one loves cake (even if the recipient is on a diet, there are tasty, healthy cake ideas out there, just ask Google). A personalised cake in their favorite flavour, maybe with a fun theme (a Vivienne Westwood Handbag for the fashionista maybe or a Clef note for the music lover) will always go down well.

I really just wrote this because I like cake, a lot (but that's not the point)

The Ten commandments (of gift giving)

1: Thou shalt employ thought.

It’s the universal golden rule of gift-giving: It’s the thought that counts. It’s true for the most part. “Thought” won’t compensate for a terrible gift, but a well-thought out gift seldom goes down badly.

2: Thou shalt gift the gift of life.

How long will this gift last them? Chocolates are an easy win, but once they’ve been eaten, that’s it. Gifts that carry some longevity are great. Timeless jewellery, or maybe something for the home. Something that they can look on fondly for a long time.

3: Thou shalt not cheat.

Unless they specifically specify what they’d like, you’ve got to do your own homework when buying a gift. Don’t ask them what they want, pay attention to them and make the right choice accordingly.

4: Thou shalt not envy.

Whilst you want to give a nice gift and one that’ll stand out, don’t turn it into a competition. Comparing gifts is a big no-no. It’s not about giving the favourite gift, just that your gift evokes the right feelings in the receiver.

5: Thou shalt not flaunt finances.

Gifts aren’t about the money spent, but rather the sentiment that goes into giving something nice to a loved one. So never rub the price in, they’ll more likely resent the gift than appreciate it more.

6: Thou shalt not present the same gift repeatedly.

So her favourite chocolates are Ferrero Rocher. Does that mean you will get her those every single time? Don’t. And even if you do, get/do something else to switch it up a bit so that there’s still some thought to your gift.

7: Thou shalt keep private jokes private

Sometimes, when buying gifts for particularly close friends or lovers, we can be tempted to buy the odd risque gift. That’s fine, but don’t present them in front of family. Last thing you want is somebody opening an adult gift in front of their grandmother.

8: Thou shalt not buy en-masse.

Buying the same gift en-masse may seem like a logical economical thing to do, especially if it’s something that they’d all like. However, giving gifts is about making people feel special and nothing makes you feel less special than being just the same as everyone else.

9: Thou shalt not spread gifts.

It doesn’t matter if their birthday is near Mothers’ Day, don’t spread the same gift over two holidays! They are two separate occasions, celebrated for different reasons. Let them feel appreciated for all that they are.

10: Thou shalt present the gift exceptionally.

After you have gone through all of the above and picked out the perfect gift, you don’t want to go and ruin it by packaging it poorly. Put as much effort into the presentation as you did in choosing it and you’ll be fine!

Any amount of time we spend doing what we enjoy is not wasted. Life, as they say is short and sometimes we do need that instant gratification we feel we have earned after maybe a hard day at work, looking after our children or other loved ones. There is nothing wrong with that, it is healthy, in moderation. Over indulgence may sometimes lead to ill-health and debt.

By all means, enjoy yourself, enjoy life, treat yourself but be mindful. Overdoing anything in life soon becomes less enjoyable. While rewarding myself, I make a conscious effort to ensure whatever activity I am engaging in will not go from giving a feeling of contentment to disappointment. Savour the moment, you really don't have to drown in it.

VanJess24

I don't know if i'm late with this, but I was surfing Youtube earlier and came across a channel with two very lovely young ladies who really CAN sing. I had to share, I don't think they are signed to any label and actually haven't really done much research into their work, but I think you guys should check out their Channel, it was so refreshing actually hearing truly beautiful voices without ANY studio gimmicks, just beautiful harmonies and a keyboard (one of those small piano things). I think they are treasures already. 

Strangers

What is it about them that gets us weary even as adults? I wonder why it still seems weird being about to walk up to a complete stranger, in a setting not necessarily seen as social, and starting a conversation about absolutely anything. A huge percentage of people in our generation do this exact same thing online everyday on dating sites, so why is it so strange in person?

Maybe it's the permanent, welcoming smiles that adorn most profile pictures online, or the reduced impact of rejection behind a screen. The way I see it, we are still talking to complete strangers, but missing out on the body language, the actual warmth ( or grumpy 'hmph' of a charmless individual) of actual physical interaction. I fancy exploring the concept of conversation with strangers when it is practical.

You should try it too. It can be very interesting.

Making your own Jewellery might be easier than you think.

Have you considered making your very own items of personal beautification? Do you realize you may actually be exceptionally good at it? With very little research you could find out, right now (If you're not terribly busy, ofcourse) details on how to give life to your own masterpieces. There is a certain delight that accompanies creating something with your own hands, an idea formed in your own mind. Give it a go, you might be great at it. I had not intended to preach about a different way to put a string through colored beads, I merely wanted to flip a switch in someone's mind. Same sort of way I'd love to plant these ideas.